Astros Owner: Of all the perjurers in Washington, this one has to throw batting practice?

Houston Astros owner Drayton McLane artfully states the obvious about Roger Clemens participating in the club's minor league camp.

McLane also wondered whether Clemens, a seven-time Cy Young Award winner, was the best person to be pitching to the players. Clemens threw batting practice for more than an hour Thursday, cajoling the players as they swung. Often, the swings were futile.

“Or what about having someone of Roger’s ability pitching to them?” McLane added. “Would it be better for them to face pitching of people that are of their age level and their skill level and their development level?”

Link

No word on whether McLane gets vitamin injections in his rear or if his wife takes HGH to look good in a bikini.

My Father Was in Prison With You

Johnny Cash used to tell stories about people coming up to him and saying, "my father was in prison with you." Johnny never was in prison. He just sang cool tunes about inmates looking out the window and imagining smoking fine cigars and having fancy dinners. But if Johnny were alive today, he would have a 1 in 106 chance of going to prison. If Johnny were black and between the ages of 20-34, he would have a 1 in 9 chance of being sent behind bars.

Our country, according to the Pew Center for the States, has increased spending by 127% (inflation adjusted) for prison in the last 20 years. The spending increase for higher education during that same time period was 21%.

Booze, Bibles, Bars.

See Al Jazeera's coverage of this story here.

The hearty amongst us might read the full report here.

Fidel would be proud.

60 minutes ran the story about former Democratic, Alabama Governor Don Siegleman, who now passes time mopping floors in the federal penitentiary. (Cliff Notes: he was convicted of taking a bribe and is serving eight years.) At least one former Republican political operative says Karl Rove took an active interest in taking down Siegleman. Another former Republican state Attorney General says the charges are trumped up. The lead attorney for the prosecution was married to the campaign manager of Siegleman's chief political rival. Freedom.

A backwater Alabama TV station even accidentally dropped the CBS feed and didn't show the Siegleman segment. See the NYT's coverage (which you should never take at face value) and the video here.

Further north, in a state that's vying for Alabama in terms of poverty and futility, federal prosecutors have set their sights on another Democrat, noted Michigan defense attorney Geoffery Fieger. The Feds have indicted Fieger on charges of illegal bundling of campaign contributions to John Edwards in 2004. Serious business there. Sending too much money to a son of a mill worker - juggernaut that won two primaries in five years of constant campaigning. Let's clean up politics starting there.

Fieger, meanwhile, has never taken anything sitting down. He's running TV ads comparing the government's interest in him to that of Nazi Germany's attack on the legal profession. See story here.

Fieger made his name defending Dr. Death.

Warhol on Politics

NYT has a nice rundown of notable campaign posters over the years.

Happy VD day! Jesus hates myspace, dry humping! <3 <3 <3

From this super hot myspace page.

"We recommend that you do not click through anywhere on myspace.com pages except from this preview section. There are many unpure pages and advertisements that you can reach from myspace.com. Go to www.DayOfPurity.org for the best web site about how to live a life of purity. The annual "Day of Purity" is observed on February 14.

"The Day of Purity is a day when this nation's youth can make a public demonstration of their commitment to remain sexually pure in mind and actions. In today's culture, students are bombarded with the message that they should become sexually active at a young age and to experiment with their sexual preferences. The Day of Purity offers those who strive for sexual purity an opportunity to stand in opposition to a culture of moral decline.

When the youth stand up for sexual purity they send a message to parents, churches, communities, legislators, and the media that they want a different America. Now is the time to let your voices be heard. Be a part of the "counter-culture" -- be politically incorrect."

Running for a Better Job

Maureen Dowd highlights the main problem for women, or those who would like to see a woman as president, Hillary Clinton isn't the person for the job. She has Bill baggage. So much that it's awfully hard for people to forget: I didn't inhale, Gennifer Flowers, health care, Whitewater, Travelgate, Vince Foster, and the abhorrent punchline that she insists on repeating - the Republican Attack Machine.

But Hillary is not the best test case for women. We’ll never know how much of the backlash is because she’s a woman or because she’s this woman or because of the ick factor of returning to the old Clinton dysfunction. Full Article

Let's hope Hillary can shake this in the years to come, provided she's not the next president. Maybe she can adopt health care as her issue and travel the world promoting it. Grow a beard. Win an Oscar. Get the Noble Prize. She can be the great liberal knight, off the stage, 'replenishing the ole coffers', and be an endearing image for generations to come. It sounds better than being president.

A Very Special Dreamisode

On Friday night I had a dream in which I found out Daniel Day Lewis played the dad on the hit television show Blossom. This really blew my mind, a eureeka moment, where I couldn't believe I had never realized that before. This was an equivilent experience to when I found out pickles came from cucumbers.

I was at the grocery store the next morning (actual reality) talking to somebody telling them that I was gonna see the There Will Be Blood that afternoon, and I thought it would be a great little tidbit of tv trivia to share. As I was telling them about Blossoms Dad, I caught myself mid-sentence realizing my dream was not reality and that Nick Russo was played by a guy named Ted Wass and was nothing like ol'Danny Day.

I just stopped and didn't say anything for an awkwardly long time, becuase I was sorting out my realities in my head.

It was the best thing that has happened to me in a long time, and nobody seems to care.

"I dreamed I was flying"

And I dreamed I was dying
I dreamed that my soul rose unexpectedly
And looking back down at me
Smiled reassuringly
And I dreamed I was flying
And high up above my eyes could clearly see
The Statue of Liberty
Sailing away to sea
--Paul Simon - American Tune

If you look closely, Lady Liberty has tears in her eyes. She's audacious and hoping but seasoned and wise. Let's sell her for oil.

Billary Hates the Truth, and Human Rights

The NYT hates transplants in thier city:


A spokesman for Mr. Clinton said the former president knew that Mr. Giustra had mining interests in Kazakhstan but was unaware of “any particular efforts” and did nothing to help. Mr. Giustra said he was there as an “observer only” and there was “no discussion” of the deal with Mr. Nazarbayev or Mr. Clinton.

But Moukhtar Dzhakishev, president of Kazatomprom, said in an interview that Mr. Giustra did discuss it, directly with the Kazakh president, and that his friendship with Mr. Clinton “of course made an impression.” Mr. Dzhakishev added that Kazatomprom chose to form a partnership with Mr. Giustra’s company based solely on the merits of its offer.

The President of Kazakstan is a huge ass too according to wikipedia:

Nursultan Abishuly Nazarbayev is believed to have transferred at least $1 billion worth of oil revenues to his private bank accounts in other countries and his family controls many other key enterprises in Kazakhstan.[18] He is also said to have benefitted financially from his "special relations" with Kazakh-Israeli billionaire Alexander Mashkevich, who, as of 2004, was believed to control as much as one-fourth of Kazakhstan's economy.

Politics is deadly

Good deeds get you on a bridge to nowhere:

Stateline reports:

After a series of high-profile statehouse scandals, Alaska legislators last year tightened ethics laws to limit what gifts lawmakers may accept. So tough are the rules, however, that state Rep. Richard Foster (D), in need of a kidney transplant, may not accept a donated one from a legislative aide, the Anchorage Daily News discloses. While the law allows for exceptions for medical emergencies, donated items must be worth less than $250, and a kidney likely surpasses that cost. Another state lawmaker, Rep. John Coghill (R), has introduced a bill to soften the rules.